It’s really surreal that I can sit in my stillness time during such chaos and confusion in the world with such wonder and innocent expectation. I know there are things happening around me that aren’t wonderful. I realize many people have gotten less than expected during the bumps of the beginning of this era. 

The definition of transformation. trans·for·ma·tion, /ˌtran(t)sfərˈmāSH(ə)n/, complete or major change in someone's or something's appearance, form; to change in composition or structure; a complete change in the appearance or character of something or someone, especially so that so that that thing or person is improved.

I have to hope in tomorrow.  More importantly, I have to hope that I will be more reverent, carefully allowing God to order my sometimes too rushed-steps, now I see through travail and revelation + I acknowledge that some behaviors and tasks are being rendered meaningless in the bigger picture. And after this devastation is behind me. I will be forever transformed.

In the cool crisp morning air, I ponder the more subtle experiences I now treasure that I admit got lost in the legalism of my daily work. The repetitive rat-race routines took the crisp sharp color out of life’s backdrop. Thankfully, recent + unique personal moments have reframed my future destiny that waited patiently for me to gain right focus.  I now allow the future and immediate to take turns.  My next dream turns to a lovely snapshot of how wonderful it will be to sit in my favorite restaurant loving people less than six feet away. I zoom in to enjoy a simple meal with my daughter, watching her beautiful laugh capture the room. I clean my inner lens to let hope arise! 

I have to believe. Believing I will be stronger than when I started this recent crooked + perverse journey. I believe the path will be made straight.  Healing shines faithfully on my stepping stone.  I am having complex, even complicated, behaviors sorted out and realigned.  I now believe belief in God is on the uptick. I believe sensitivity for the preciousness of life will increase because of the ferocious kidnapping that, not only crept into our lives but, snatched our soul unaware. I certainly believe the gag on my spiritual voice has been pulled off. I believe my stillness time has strengthened me to boldly affirm, while conquering and defeating my high hills. Just like God promised I would! Let continual transforming belief in Christ arise! 

Today I’ll expect. Expecting more from what I thought I couldn’t tolerate. Great expectations will guide me on how to stand against spiritual restraint. I’ll expect - and demand- less from those feeling they haven’t given enough because of their shame or guilt. I expect they will see it’s now nailed to the cross. My lack of tolerance and need for certainty has been replaced with mercy. I will do my part + help them see the lies that have broken their dream of hope + expectation. Empathy will be the fresh, more dynamic soft skill that I will take up. It will take it’s rightful place in my daily coming in and going out. I cry out for its mantel. I pray for the covering that gives me grace to hold on to a more yielded life - the one that’s become more precious in 30 days or less. 

Sitting here - expecting, hoping, believing, praying, and yielding - the wonderment of it all. The transformation of it all!

Living Life in wonder Today!

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